jobs bern would love

lara croft's assistant personal groomist


















of course, one day i could only hope
to be her actual personal groomist
being in charge of brushing dandruff
off her shoulders or any jutting surface














in the meantime as assistant
i would in charge of the two dangly bits
that ever so gingerly dance with her bosom


















life could be worse
as A.P.G. its my job to stand in front her
and stare down at "her strands"
to make sure they are even

hey - somebody's gotta do it

bern shares
bv)

ps heaven forbid you should think im highbrow eh