when i was teenager i decided
come hell or high water I was gonna
live happily ever after
using my parents euphemisticly incongruous relationship
as a spring board i vaulted in the opposite direction

from my father:
i didnt get his height but i did get his pig headedness
(yep no height just his 'husky'ness)
from mom:
i got her tenacity and her lack of height
(bummer - never quite got to 5'9')
from my father:
i got control freak
from mom:
i got the ability to usurp control quietly
they call it PAB - passive agressive behavior
["bullshit" (muffled in a sneeze)]

from a previous failed marriage i have my ash
"failed" pertains to my marriage
"serendipitous" pertains to my ash
my little lovely is now 22
she is a pixie
a journeyman and already quite eccentric
God bless your merry soul my dear

so... coming from an oppressive childhood
and passing thru a pre"mature" marriage
i wasnt any closer to living happily ever after
but i do have a cool ass beautiful kid
[i wonder sometimes how far from centre i might have strayed
had i not (unbegrudgingly) had the responsibilty
to be a role model for a blossoming wee petunia]

anyhoo
i tested the babe-waters several times over the years:
*dumped one cuz she called me chicken for being scaird of roller coasters
*tail-gaited in west virginia with a young uni-grad
until i got traded for a younger model
*lived with a nurse for a spell - she was nice
*and of course theres the "A"word - bless her heart
from her i learned how desperate and ill prepared i was
to "live happily ever after"
*and then there is T

i have learned a few things over the last ten years
...i am not bound by my parents conventions
the definition of relationship is radically different
times have changed
"cook my dinner cuz i bring home the bacon " doesnt fly anymore

[obscure metaphor warning]
tins are good for rice and spices
tins are not good for feelings and emotions
bern - STOP putting things in managable containers
surf your life babe!
surf your life
so ...i reduced "living happily ever after"
to "living happy"
this is one old dog who is hell bent on learning some new tricks dadgumitt
papas got a brand new bag

im back baby
pledging to myself
to be more open and and more frank (ww frank)
kind of like "the summer of george"

T is certainly the beautiful lady
:) xoxo babe



where'er i roam
whatever realms to see
my heart untravelled
fondly turns to thee





que sera que sera
whatever we will be we will be

bern shares
bv)